Hugs

just an observation.

I've been spending a lot of time with Angela (my friend/a teacher at my school), her mum and their neighbors Sam (a grade 6 student) and his mum lately. One of the most remarkable things that I've noticed is that no one touches each other. Aside from a smack on Sam's head when he does something dumb, everyone keeps their hands to themselves... I guess that is true for a lot of my observations thus far in China. Occasionally you see parents giving their kids hugs, or married couples putting a hand on their partner's shoulders... and you'll often see young dating couples smooching at night on park benches... but they just aren't overwhelmingly touchy people the way we are at home... or at least the way my people are at home! We are touchers. Hands on knee, shoulders, arms when talking, lots of hugs, kisses and bed sharing with your buddies. It is just normal. And it is something that I crave so desparately while I am away. I miss human contact. I miss compassion and reading someone's face and kindness that is shown through physical manifestations.

I mean, when I think about China's history, it shouldn't surprise me that things are so different... so very stoic and private... but I miss it.

I'm trying my hardest to bring a little bit of change to my small world over here... I give Angela's mom a hug every time I go over to their house, and slowly, she has started to turn her chest so that instead of getting a shoulder to my chest, I get a full on hug. And she holds on to me for more than a split second. She still tells me I am strong and big, but you know, can't fight it all... It is still wonderful. Sam's mom is still a bit hesitant, but when I just touch her hand instead of hug her, she tells me to give her a hug, because she wants to learn how to be more affectionate. It is wonderful and beautiful and I am so touched to have these people in my life. Pics to come. Tomorrow is Sam's birthday and I am invited to his party so I will take some photos of my new family:)


angela and her mom